![]() ![]() Her followers don’t call her ‘the Jimi Hendrix of strokers’ for nothing She will be allowed to have this most profound and deep experience with another human being.’ The difference is that she will be there with a partner. And then, just like a master chess player absorbed in a game, or a meditator absorbed in his breathing, you’ll see her get absorbed into that place. Both she and I will be putting our attention on the same point. ‘In a moment,’ Daedone announced, ‘I will put my finger on the upper left-hand quadrant of Cherwitz’s clitoris if she were facing you, that’s the one-o’clock position. She isn’t currently a lesbian, as her concupiscent personal dating blog makes clear, but she was about to perform on her close friend and lieutenant, Rachel Cherwitz, who was hovering nearby, a pale and thin young woman whose sad eyes were framed by dark, shoulder-length brown hair, calling to mind a melancholy angel in a Pre-Raphaelite painting. It’s going to be a definition of orgasm that actually works with a woman’s body.’Īs she talked, Daedone made a curling gesture with her right-hand index finger, a finger that knows how to play a woman like a cello. But it’s going to be a very different definition of orgasm than we know. ‘We have a pleasure deficit disorder in this country,’ she continued. ‘Woman after woman was coming through my office,’ she said, ‘chanting what I call the Western Woman’s Mantra: “I work too hard, I eat too much, I diet too much, I drink too much, I shop too much, I give too much, and still there’s this sense of hunger that I can’t touch.”’ I could hear low murmurs of agreement from some of the women in the audience. In a 2011 TedX talk, Daedone explained how she came to the revelation that something new was needed. She must also have been involved in psychotherapy. ‘I have been a postmodern feminist lesbian and a meditation practitioner, a yogini and a mystery-school student.’ ![]() ‘I have been a magna cum laude academic, a gallery-owner, a stripper, an underworld traveller, and the daughter of a man who died in prison for child molestation,’ she wrote in a blog recently. ![]() What that source was I wasn’t sure yet, but I was getting close.īy her own admission, Daedone has led something of a chameleon’s life. They were connected in that they spoke the same lingo, had identical or similar practices, and appeared to share the same Ur-source. All focused on the skill of gently stimulating a woman (or a man) to the edge of climax in order to extend his or her orgasms, and therefore theoretically her ecstasy, past its normal limits. They were part of what Daedone like to call the ‘Slow Sex’ movement, but which I was starting to see as a full-blown orgasm industry, composed of groups and individuals mostly centred in the San Francisco Bay area. She wore a black skirt and top that looked sprayed on, and black suede boots with four-inch stiletto heels.Īlthough this was the first time I was seeing her, I’d been on the track of Daedone and her ilk for some weeks as a journalist. She was a tall, attractive, rail-thin woman, with high cheekbones and shoulder-length blonde hair. Nicole Daedone, author of the book Slow Sex: The Art and Craft of the Female Orgasm (2011), and inventor of a sexual technique called ‘Orgasmic Meditation’, walked confidently to the front of the room. Most were 30-something, good-looking, well-dressed Manhattan professionals. Perhaps 40 of us, an equal number of men and women, sat on rows of folding metal chairs in a high-ceilinged room in the ground floor of a church in New York’s East Village that had been converted into a community centre. ![]()
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